As the world mourns Queen Elizabeth II’s death, I wonder how much does the world really know who she was. For example, did you know the below?
At 18 she spent 5 months as a mechanic and army truck driver towards the end of World War II despite her father saying she should not pitch in
This made her the first female royal family member to serve in the military
She loved cars, had quite the collection, and had a special fondness for Land Rovers
One of her most memorable evenings was with her sister Margaret when they joined the massive crowds celebrating the end of World War II on May 8, 1945 in the streets of London
She never attended school, she was completely taught by private tutors at home
How about these?
She was actually related to her husband Philip, they were third cousins and she bought her wedding dress with WWII ration coupons
Queens don’t have to pay income or capital gains taxes, yet she voluntarily did so since 1993
Until recently she used to drink gin before lunch, wine with her meal, and a dry martini and / or a glass of champagne every evening before bed
She had a great sense of humor, a talent for mimicry, and could imitate the sound of a Concorde Jet Landing
Surprised by any of the above? If yes these are great examples of how appearances can be deceiving.
Over the course of my 20+ years as a change agent, I have seen time and time again someone judging another simply by what they see or experience from the person on the surface. The question is, as a change agent / leader, how often are you deceived by appearances? Wondering how to assess this? How often do you do the below?
You quickly judge someone’s behavior based on one interaction with them only to find out later you had completely misjudged them and / or the situation
You take little or no time to get to know your peers, direct reports, coworkers, family, and friends by finding out what makes them tick, what their aspirations are, what their strengths are, etc.
When you ask someone how they are, and they hesitate and then say, “I’m okay”, you think they actually are okay or have no interest in finding out what is going on with them
You believe what someone tells you about a coworker, friend, etc. without confirming for yourself whether what was shared is actually true
You act on something an employee, family member, or friend says without confirming whether your understanding of what they said, is what they were trying to communicate
If any of the above resonates, you are most likely missing a lot of what is below the surface. Think about an iceberg, if you’re only focused on what you can see above the water, you’re missing the majority of it that lies below the water. People are the same way, there is much more depth to them than what you see on the surface. So what kind of change agent / leader do you want to be, one who only sees what’s on the surface and gets deceived by appearances? Or one who sees the full person in front of you?
Call to Action
Want help shifting from being deceived by appearances to fully seeing people? Reach out to Rosanne for support so you can be a more effective change agent / leader.
Using the comments feature, what is an example of where you were deceived by appearances?
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About the Author: Rosanne Essiambre helps change agents and departments in one-on-one and group settings to be seen, be heard, and be effective in bringing about change in the organization and/or in their personal lives. She provides consulting and facilitation to organizations to improve communications and collaboration, smooth out the change / transformation journey, get to the root cause of an issue so it can be solved for good, improve processes, and implement successful lessons learned. And she conducts workshops, trains, and speaks on Energy Leadership, Emotional Intelligence, Resilience, Being a Change Agent and more. If you or your organization could use support with your change effort or some inspiration, contact Rosanne for a complimentary discovery session. Rosanne is a Change Agent Coach, Facilitator, Six Sigma Black Belt, Change Management / Continuous Improvement Consultant, Speaker, and Energy Leadership Index Master Practitioner with more than 20 years experience working on a variety of transformations across a diverse set of industries both domestically and internationally, while continuously improving herself.