How Well do you Apologize?

How Well do you Apologize?

How often does the below happen when you apologize to someone?

  • The person has their arms crossed

  • You receive an eye roll from the person

  • The person says nothing or they get upset

  • A big exasperated sigh escapes the person’s lips

  • The person has a look of irritation on their face

If you’re a change agent / leader and the above frequently happens when you apologize, whether it’s in your professional or personal life, it’s time to admit to yourself, you could improve how you say I’m sorry. Especially if you’ve been doing any of the below when apologizing:

  • Explaining why you did what you did

  • Defending your actions or making excuses

  • Following the words “I’m sorry” with the word “but”

  • Not actually feeling remorseful

  • Neglecting to ask how you can make it up to the person

Read on for what you’re actually doing if any of the first four items above fit, and how you can effectively apologize going forward.

How Much Sisu do you Have?

How Much Sisu do you Have?

Watching the Covid numbers rise once again across the country, and talking to many people who feel they’re on an emotional rollercoaster during this pandemic, a word I recently learned comes to mind. That word is sisu (pronounced see’-soo). According to finlandia.edu, “Sisu is a Finnish term that can be roughly translated into English as strength of will, determination, perseverance, and acting rationally in the face of adversity.” Sisu is the quality that lets the Finnish people pick themselves up, learn something from previous failures, and overcome adversity.

Reflecting back 15 years ago to when I was consulting in Finland, I now realize the invitation an American coworker and I received from a Finnish colleague to jump in the ocean in the dead of winter (i.e. ice swim) and then sauna, is one of the ways for the Finnish people to demonstrate and / or build up their sisu, in addition to being a way to address the winter blues. My American colleague and I both politely declined the offer as we were both quite content to stay warm indoors. And if I had known then what I know now about sisu, I may have made a different choice.

As change agents and leaders, we can frequently encounter challenges, setbacks, and adversity at work. Encountering so much adversity in our personal life however may or may not be familiar. Now that you know what sisu is, which of the below describes your sisu when it comes to adversity at work? How about in your personal life?

How Easy Is It for Customers to Use Your Product or Service?

How Easy Is It for Customers to Use Your Product or Service?

In the past few weeks I have learned way more about toilets and how toilet seats attach than I have ever wanted to. After having the plastic hinges wear out and break on a porcelain toilet seat on one of my toilets, I ignorantly thought, “no big deal, get a new toilet seat, unscrew the old one, and screw in the new one”. Boy was I in for a rude awakening.

Why am I talking about toilets and toilet seats? They’re simply another product that we use. As change agents / leaders, frequently we’re focused on continuously improving a product or service. As you think about the product or service you’re working on or responsible for, ask yourself:

  • How easy is it for customers to use your product or service?

  • What is the customer experience when it comes to product maintenance / repairs?

  • How open minded are you and your staff to customer feedback on the above?

  • How well are customers listened to on the above?

After going through the below product experience with one of my toilets, I decided to write this blog post to illustrate how a company can frustrate its customers with:

  • Their product design

  • How they choose to respond to customer feedback


How Well are You and Your Organization Handling the Transition?

How Well are You and Your Organization Handling the Transition?

Now that almost all the states are open again, organizations are wrestling with whether to bring people back into the office, do a hybrid model, or continue to have their employees work remote. After more than a year of working from home and not having to deal with a commute, going back to work in the office or a hybrid model is a big transition for most people, especially parents.

As change agents / leaders, we see how hard transitions can be on people. Many people thrive on routine as it helps us:

  • Find safety and gives us a sense of control

  • Reduce anxiety and lower stress

  • Improve sleep

  • Boost our cognitive function

  • Cope with the continual flow of decisions in our lives

Whether the transition from your routine is you’re returning to work in the office, or another of the transitions below, how well are you handling the change? Wondering how normal are the emotions you're experiencing during this transition?

What Kind of Canary in the Coal Mine are You?

What Kind of Canary in the Coal Mine are You?

As we take the day to honor those who served our country and are no longer with us, the canaries who also helped keep many Americans safe come to mind. In addition to canaries being used in coal mines to uncover the presence of carbon monoxide, they were also used in several wars as an early warning device to detect certain poisonous gases to save human lives.

Why am I talking about canaries in relation to being a change agent? As change agents and leaders, many times we are the proverbial canary in the coal mine in an organization. We see things in the organization that others do not seem to see. What we do with these insights and how the organization responds to us can differ. Read on to see what kind of canary in the coal mine are you?

How Often do you Ignore a Person's Feelings?

How Often do you Ignore a Person's Feelings?

As change agents and leaders, we frequently interact with stakeholders who are naturally feeling a lot about a change. Ignoring these feelings can result in stakeholders:

  • Feeling unseen, unheard, unsupported, unimportant, and more stressed

  • Disliking you as they may view you as uncaring and insensitive

  • Not trusting you

  • Being more hostile and resistant

In addition to the above applying to stakeholders, the same results occur in any relationship where you ignore a person’s feelings, whether it’s your partner, child, parent, friend, etc.

What does ignoring someone’s feelings look like? Take the recent personal experience I had with my vaccine.

Be Seen, Be Heard, Be Effective in Bringing about Change